Category Archives: Writing

“Mommy Porn”– The Answer for The Desperate Housewife?

I’m taking on a heavy topic today, folks. One that’s serious. Some might say that as a Christian writer I should stay away from such a topic, but I think differently. There’s a growing trend in publishing that can’t be ignored. We’re losing readers, faith-based writers! We need to figure out why and what we can do to encourage readers to pass by the books they’re choosing and choose ours instead. It’s a timeless battle, but one that’s come to the forefront with the emergence of new technologies.

I’m talking desperate housewives– not the TV show, but the real women. The ones who are, according to our society, unhappy and unfulfilled at home. And how do they find happiness and fulfillment? Sex. Just ask any one of the very promiscuous characters on said TV show. Or the studies that show that unhappy homemakers are increasingly turning toward gratification in the form of fiction.

Welcome to the digital age– the age of eBooks, huge increases in self-publishing, and the rapidly growing markets of fan fiction and erotica.

The numbers of straight-to-eBook self-pubbed erotic novels are apparently attracting huge numbers of women, so say the number crunchers.

Why? Because it’s easier for women to hide their “guilty” pleasures now–they can download them straight to the eReader of choice. No more public judgement from cashiers at the bookstore or hiding a saucy cover from curious eyes.

Don’t believe me? Here’s just one of the gazillion articles that’s been published recently about this surge in numbers.

We aren’t talking about light romance here, either. No Nicholas Sparks story where the couple might end up in bed together but the details are left to the imagination. Nope, we’re talking about a serious, descriptive, pornographic novel that leaves very little to the imagination.

But what’s the attraction? Why are women drawn to these stories? It’s not the stellar narrative, because stellar narrative and craft aren’t what these authors are going for.

Take Fifty Shades of Grey for example: Started as Twilight fan fiction. Self-pubbed eBook trilogy. Drew huge numbers. Contracted for world-wide printed and eBook release. Sold movie rights. Considered a phenomenon. Erotic fiction based on some fantasy about a restricted college student and a billionaire with fetish for abusive sexual exploits. Rave reviews from swooning readers, negative reviews from other authors, critics, and industry leaders for lack-luster writing and weaknesses in all areas.

Yeah, I haven’t read these books. I have no desire to do so. But I have read several articles about the books because I’m curious about the label given to them and books like them– Mommy Porn.

According to analysts, women, specifically “mommies” between the ages of 20-45, are eating these books up– using them the same way a man might use porn– to create sexual fantasies.

And since it’s my blog and I can be honest, I have to tell you– this phenomenon really, really disturbs me.

As if we needed more reasons for marriages to fail, for women to feel devalued, for women to forget and ignore the very reasons for which they were created, more reasons to create negative views on what sex is and how it is to be treated in a loving, Christ-centered relationship.

As if the “world” needed more ammunition against the institution of marriage.

As if teens and young people needed more ammunition against the very idea of a healthy relationship that could lead to marriage.

Yeah, I look at this whole phenomenon as an attack on marriage and positive relationships between men and women. Here’s yet another example of how we, as a society, are valuing sex over everything else in a relationship.

It’s been this way since the dawn of time. As a history teacher I can tell you honestly that nothing makes the world go ’round like sex, money, and religion. And sometimes you can combine all three and discover that they are behind some of the world’s greatest events and most powerful people.

It’s a war long waged. And it seems like it’s taking down some of the ones who had been able to avoid it before. Now, thanks to eReaders, any shame is hidden, so more women are indulging.

And what is this indulgence doing?

  • Creating an unrealistic view of sex in a relationship. For a long time, many have argued that romantic fiction creates an unrealistic view of “happily ever after” and actually harms relationships by giving women an unrealistic view of men. Although I don’t agree with that argument, I do think that erotic fiction is dangerous– it gives women a view of sex as completely the opposite of what it should be, as it was created by the Creator.
  • Reinforcing the idea that sex outside of marriage is acceptable, even encouraged. We should be instilling in our young people the idea that sex is perfect within a marriage only, as it was designed. How can we do that when parents (“mommies”) don’t believe it?
  • Encouraging women to “sleep around” to find the right guy. We have enough of this in our society as it is.
  • Encouraging women to believe that they are sex objects before anything else. If “Mr. Right” in the book is only right because of how he performs in the bedroom, something is very, very wrong.
  • Encouraging women to fantasize sexually about someone other than her husband.
  • Opening the door to sexual addictions, no different than an addiction that someone might have to pornographic photographs.
  • Putting the emphasis of the relationship on sex. Again, we have enough of this in our society as it is.

I have more thoughts on this topic which will make themselves known in future posts, like how we as faith-based writers can combat this growing phenomenon, but for now, I want your thoughts.

Share with me: What do you think the “Mommy Porn” phenomenon is about? Why are women drawn to these erotic books? Are housewives really so desperate?

 

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Filed under Marriage, Romance, Writing

What’s Distracting You From Your REAL Calling?

What’s distracting you from what God’s called you to do?

This was the question asked by my pastor from the pulpit.

Easy, I thought. Everything.

Immediately my brain went into overdrive, listing all the things that distracted me from writing.

Laundry. Cleaning. The Internet. Time. Obligations. My children. TV. My husband. Life. Time. Lack of time. Church responsibilities. Friends. Life. Laundry. Cooking. Grocery shopping. Time. Twitter. My emotions. Life.

I started making mental lists of all the things that distracted me and how I could better organize my life to contain or limit these distractions.

God called me to be a writer. And life distracts me from it.

My pastor continued to talk, but it wasn’t his voice I heard in my ear. My pastor’s voice was but a murmur, while a stronger, clearer voice rang through me, piercing my heart with conviction. God spoke to me as my mind whirled, stilling my thoughts with one clear statement.

Before I called you to write, I called you to be a wife and a mother.

Did I mention conviction?

Here I was, trying to figure out what I could do to limit the things that were distracting me from writing, including better management of my family, when it’s writing that’s distracting me from them.

Writing is distracting me from my first, true calling.

God has called me to write. But before that, he called me to be wife and mom.

Priorities. Calling. Being the woman God has called me to be.

I’m passionate about my family. I’m passionate about writing. God has called me to do both, but I know what the real distractions are.

Share with me: What’s distracting you from your real calling?

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Filed under Family, The Christian Walk, Writing

Is It Okay to Write Fan Fiction?

 

In case you haven’t seen it, that’s the sneak peek teaser trailer for Breaking Dawn part 2 above. Why would I post that? Because I’m thinking about Twilight fan-fiction, of course. (Ha! Of course?) It’s all the rage. And so is a lot of other fan fiction. As long as there’s a fan willing to write it, it’s out there.

In case you aren’t familiar with it, fan fiction is just what it sounds like. Imitation fiction written by fans. Perhaps it’s a continuation of the story where the author left off. Perhaps it’s the story re-written with different outcomes. Whatever, it’s written by fans and not normally published in print form. Most often it’s usually posted online.

Time for another in the “Is it okay to _____?” series. And readers, don’t think today’s question is just for writers. It’s not. I want your opinion, too, even if you don’t write. Because you do read–and that’s what keeps writers in business.

Today’s question comes to my mind because of the buzz that’s been created around Fifty Shades of Grey.

If you haven’t heard of this novel, here’s a brief rundown of it’s author.

E.L. James: mother of two who lives in London, began with Twilight fan-fiction and turned it into a semi-erotic (NC-17, so they say) trilogy that apparently sold like wild-fire as an e-book, and now has been contracted for both e-book distribution and print copies– all 3 books. FYI- she did tweak the plot & change the names of her characters.

We aren’t going to discuss the issue of whether or not erotic fiction should be written or read by anybody– that’s for another time. And don’t get me started about my concern that this is a story & plot based on major best-sellers that were marketed for youth– and James’ books are clearly not for youth.

And no, I haven’t read Fifty Shades of Grey or the other books in the series. But I keep hearing about these books everywhere. Online. On the news. On the radio. Yep, someone has done some seriously fantastic marketing or something.

But back to fan fiction. They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Readers– do you want more of the stories you love, even if they aren’t from the original author?

Writers– ever tried your hand at fan fiction? And how would you feel if a fan wrote something based on your story?

Share with me: Is it okay to write fan fiction? (Also with this, do you read fan fiction?)

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Filed under Is It Okay To ____?, Writing