Category Archives: Uncategorized

January 14, 2013 · 9:30 am

Going Beyond Forgiveness

There’s a person in my life who makes me feel like I’m on a constant roller coaster.

I never know where I stand with her. Sometimes I think we’re friends and then she’ll let me know in no uncertain terms that we are not. Followed shortly by a bought of close “friendship.” Followed by me finding myself in the dog house. Followed by her friendship. Dog house. Friendship. Dog house. Vicious cycle.

I find the entire thing very difficult to bear, especially because I’m the innocent bystander. This person holds a grudge like I have never seen in my life, and has often complained to me about the wrongs done to her by others– wrongs she’s stated that she will never, ever forgive.

This person is a born-again, God fearing, Bible believing Christian. Who refuses to forgive.

I’m certain I’m on her list of “unforgivables” for at least one thing or two, and I don’t even know what I’ve done.

I’ve been reading through the book Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow and its brilliance has blinded me.

In the chapter on forgiveness, she points out that unforgiveness breeds the seeds of bitterness. She goes on to say that those who refuse to forgive will suffer, as per the parable Jesus told in Matthew 18:23-35 about the man who refused to forgive the debtor as the king forgave him, and he was sent to the torture chamber.

If we refuse to forgive, we will suffer the torture of our own bitterness, eating us up inside, destroying us from the inside out. Jesus told us so.

As I read through this chapter, I thought of my friend. But I also came to realize that I needed to forgive. I need to make sure I’ve forgiven her for all of the times she’s hurt me with the pendulum swings of her emotions and unforgiveness.

But I have to go beyond making the choice to forgive (and yes it is a choice, because we don’t often want to).

Linda poses this question in her book– what have you done to show that you’ve forgiven?

This question hit me square in the chest. It’s one thing to forgive someone within yourself. It’s an entirely other thing to make the choice to show, through action, that you’ve forgiven.

And this forgiveness should apply to everyone– your spouse, friends, family members, acquaintances, neighbors…

Some people think, “I’ll forgive, but I’m going to cut that person out of my life.”

But what of the example of Christ? How many times did the disciples disappoint him? When they fell asleep in the garden when he needed them. When he was betrayed. When they acted out of fear. Etc., etc., etc.

But Jesus always forgave. And beyond that, he showed them love. He didn’t cut the people who had wronged him from his life–just the opposite. Jesus reached out to those who had wronged him and chose to show love through his actions.

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Romans 12:9-10,14,18

This is what we are commanded to do.

Go beyond the forgiveness. Make a conscious choice to forgive, over and over and over with the same person if necessary, and make a choice to deliberately and intentionally show love through action.

This is how we grow in Christ, and this is how we truly mirror him and reflect the spirit within us.

Share with me: Can you think of a time when someone forgave you and went beyond the forgiveness to show you love?

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Filed under The Christian Walk, Uncategorized

Tagged as Calm My Anxious Heart, forgiveness, Jesus Christ, Linda Dillow, love

January 3, 2013 · 6:00 am

One Word for 2013

Let me begin with a big, giant HAPPY NEW YEAR!

So, a bunch of us “blogger-types” have been blogging this week about our ONE word for 2013. Rather than making resolutions (that I never, ever keep) I’ve decided to jump on this bandwagon because I love the idea.

One word that focuses my year. One word that drives me. One word that defines my thinking, my prayer life, my worship, and my daily tasks. My one word for 2013 is–

It’s a command. It’s a challenge. It’s exciting. It’s hopeful.

I blogged recently about commitment being one of the life lessons I want my sons to learn and ever since that post, this word keeps nagging my brain. Some of you may look at this word, take it at face value and think, “okay, she’s going to commit to writing. Or Bible study. Or a new task…or something.”

But actually, this word means a whole lot more to me this year.

I have a nasty habit of living my life for tomorrow. I’m always thinking about what’s ahead, always looking down the road to the next step or stage of my life, always worrying about how to get there, how to make it great, and how to enjoy it. So much so that I’m missing the NOW.

So in 2013, I’m committing to NOW.

I’m committing to the moments of NOW– each one precious, each one filled with a messy house, pregnancy symptoms, moments of laughter, joy, my sons, my husband, my family, the addition that will soon arrive in our family, writing, laughing, loving, reading, studying, BEING.

I’m committing to these moments.

2012 was a scant year for writing for me, so I’m committing wholeheartedly to that, too. I’m committing to finding God in each part of my life, in every moment that He has ordained.

I think this word for 2013 will help me focus on all aspects of my life; where commitment needs to be stronger, where my commitments need to change my priorities, and how committing to the moment will change me.

I’m committing to being the woman God has created me to be, and I’m going to let that influence every aspect of my life.

I’m excited about this word!!

Share with me: What’s your one word for 2013?

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December 3, 2012 · 6:00 am

Teacher Gifts- The 12 Days of Christmas

It’s the Christmas season, which means not only are you shopping for friends and family, but also for all the teachers in the lives of your children.

School teachers, Sunday school teachers, extra-curricular activities teachers, even coaches! Yep, they are probably all on your list.

Seeing as how I am married to a teacher and I was a teacher myself, I’m pretty sure that I am an expert in the area of “Teacher Gifts.” So let me help you out this year.

I wanted to do something special for my son’s teacher, but we live on a budget, so what did I do? I turned to Pinterest, of course. From there I was inspired, added my own touches, and came up with the Twelve Days of Christmas for Teachers.

The original inspiration came from this site, but I changed some of the gift choices and created my own gift tags.

My gift choices–

Twelve Days of Christmas for Teachers

Day 1- hand lotion
Day 2- gourmet chocolates
Day 3- popcorn
Day 4- dry erase markers
Day 5- cocoa
Day 6- glue sticks
Day 7- stickers
Day 8- pens
Day 9- Hershey Kisses
Day 10- monogram note cards
Day 11- gloves & chocolate
Day 12- candle and socks

Each gift will be wrapped and sent with a little note that includes a poem about that day’s item.

Here’s an example of one of the gift tag poems:

To stay in my seat is what you want me to do,

Sometimes you just might have to use glue!

None of the gifts included in this project cost me more than $5 each.

While some of the gifts match the number of the day that they are on (5 packages of cocoa for day 5, etc), not all of them do. That’s okay. As long as the poem you send on that day makes sense, it’s all good.

I went to the dollar store to purchase cute little gift bags (25 for $1). Add tissue paper and some ribbon, and each day holds a special surprise.

Your child can deliver a gift every day for 12 days, or you can package all of the items together into one large gift. I plan to let my son deliver a daily gift.

To use the gift tag poems I created, click below.

12 Days Gift Tags– click to print

This is an example of the gift tags with poems that I made. Click below to print.

This is an example of the gift tag with poem.

** Keep in mind that my son goes to a Christian school, so some of these poems do mention the Bible and God.

If you aren’t feeling up to doing the 12 Days, here are some tips when buying presents for teachers:

School supplies and items that can be used in the classroom are helpful because many teachers have to spend money from their own pockets to keep supplies in their classrooms. Computer paper is always great because it’s often not supplied by the school, and teachers print a lot of stuff.
If you have an “about me” page from your child’s teacher that includes things like favorite food, favorite candle scent, favorite restaurant, etc., don’t ignore that. Those papers are supposed to make your shopping life easier. For example, I know that my son’s teacher really likes Hershey’s chocolate, so I made sure to include that in the 12 Days.
If you have a little more money to spend, gift cards to movies and restaurants are ALWAYS appreciated.
If you really want to go all out, think a gift certificate for a spa day or a gift card to the mall or a clothing store.
If you don’t have a ton of money to spend, think about doing a $5 gift card to a place like Starbucks or Dunkin’ Donuts. A little treat can be a big deal. (These kinds of gifts work great for male teachers, too!)
Personalized stationary makes a great gift. Notepads or cards are great for sending notes home to parents or just jotting things down at school.
A nice pen is also a great gift. Teachers write. A lot.
Try to be intentional. Don’t go for the easy “apple”. Look for something that would make that teacher smile, like a desktop joke calendar.
Have your child write a note to the teacher expressing some kind personal thoughts about him/her. Many teachers save notes like this, especially as your child ages and the notes become fewer and farther between. I taught high school, and I still have a box of personal notes from students. They make my heart happy.

What NOT to give a teacher:

ANY KIND of jewelry or clothing, etc., that has an apple, a bus, a pencil, or any other teaching paraphernalia on it. Don’t do it. It’s not as cute as you think it is.
Ornaments. An ornament can be a nice gift, but teachers get a lot of ornaments. If you go for one that’s personalized or represents something special about that teacher, then it might be okay. But referring above, do NOT go with a school bus, a pencil, or an apple. Or an ornament with your kid’s face on it. See below.
A framed photograph of your child. No offense, but teachers are just like you– they don’t want random photos in their homes, and they certainly can’t display framed photos of your kid at school. Favoritism much?
Homemade goodies. Again, teachers tend to get a lot of these. More than they can eat. Most of it ends up in the trash.

Another teacher gift idea:

I wanted to do something cute for some of the other teachers in my boys lives, and once again, Pinterest inspired.

I decided to make these adorable Soap Reindeer.