The Change-Up & Religion v. Divorce

I’ve been reading a lot about blogging and thinking a lot about blogging, and believe it or not, praying about my web-presence and what I intend to do with it.

First things first, I’ve decided to make some changes. These changes, while minor, are for a purpose.

In case you’ve never paid attention to my “Blog Topics by Day” schedule, here’s the rundown. (It’s over here, too.) ————————————>

Muse Monday- posts about the daily walk as a disciple and follower of Christ.
Writer Wednesday- posts about writing and the publishing process.
Forrest Gump Friday- you never know what you’re gonna get.

Well, I’ve made a little adjustment. I will no longer be using Writer Wednesday to blog about the writing/publishing process.

Why? you might ask. Mostly because I realized that by doing so, I’m alienating the audience that I want to cultivate–those who will read my novels when they come out. Sure, some of you who are also interested in the writing process might be kind enough to buy my book someday, but for the most part the readers are just that–readers, and you don’t care a lick about the writing process.

And I don’t blame you. I’ve come to terms with my seat-of-the-pants writer self, and I’ve realized that the process itself, while vital to the construction of a great story, doesn’t interest me enough to blog about it on a regular basis. There are plenty of other fantastic writers who do that much better than I ever could.

So, from now on I’ll be using Wednesdays to blog specifically about the topics that influence my stories, ie, romance, comparative religions, romance, history, current events, romance, social movements, oh, and romance. (And I’m not putting myself in a box here because tons and tons of different things inspire me as a writer.)

I hope that you, as the reader, will jump in and discuss the topics I present, share your opinions (Hey Lurkers! I really DO want your opinions!) and cultivate a friendship with me so that one day when my books are released, you’ll know what I’m passionate about and where my stories come from.

Is Religion Linked to Divorce? South Has Highest Rates Says Census.

As a Southern Belle myself, this headline caught my attention right away. But as I read the article, I’m not certain that the author made the point she intended.

 (By the way, I hate the word “religious”, but I’m sticking with it for this post because of the article above.)

The article does state that the South has the highest rate of divorce, but it also has the highest rate of marriage. The Northern states might have lower rates of divorce, but they also have lower marriage rates.  So, the question, I think, is not Is Religion Linked to Divorce, but Is Lack of Religion Linked to Lack of Marriage?

I can’t think of a single person who hasn’t somehow been touched by divorce. My father’s parents were divorced. My husband’s parents are divorced. Some friends of mine are currently going through a divorce. Several members of my family have been divorced.

Divorce is common in today’s society, and I often think it has nothing to do with religion at all.

Many of us have married with the idea that divorce is not an option. But I believe that in the back of our minds, even “we” (the “religious”) know that there are circumstances that would cause us to break up our marriage–like infidelity or abuse.

And what about the line in the article that states that one of the causes of the high divorce rate in the South is because of “low pre-marriage cohabitation rates”? Wow. What do you think of that?

Share with me: Why do you think divorce is so prevalent in today’s society, even among the “religious”? Southerners–why do you think the South has higher rates of divorce? Northerners–what’s your view on this? Can’t wait to see the responses on this topic!!

9 Comments

Filed under Marriage

9 responses to “The Change-Up & Religion v. Divorce

  1. It's an interesting notion. I'd be interested to see that actual science behind the study to see if they actually statistically accounted for the lower marriage rate in Northern states compared to the South. But yeah, it's a sociological fact that in the South, people are more likely to get married than cohabitate, whether for moral/religious reasons or peer pressure or whatever, so on the surface anyway, it seems likely that we could have a higher divorce rate due to that. But I think you can't look at that without adjusting for the fact that lots of people in other parts of the country may cohabitate for years and never feel the "pressure" or need to marry (until possibly kids are involved). I can think of several people who said they don't need "a piece of paper" to legitimize their relationship.

  2. Kait- great point. I've also known people who've lived together for years with no intention of marriage. I'd like to see the science behind this, too. For example, were the divorced couples surveyed asked if they considered themselves "religious"? There's lots of unanswered questions here.

  3. if you're going to correlate things like religion to divorce, why not consider other things, like virginity or age. I suspect that when two virgins first enjoy sexual congress on their wedding night, they'll be less likely to divorce than otherwise. And if two teenagers get married, they're more likely to divorce than an older couple.Christianity discourages fornication. This is a two-edged sword when people who aren't right for each other marry just to get laid. But if a couple is compatible, i think the abstinence favored by this religion leads to longer-lived marriages.The truth of Christianity is seen when its values are lived out and is undermined by professed Christians' failings.Disclaimer, my experience affects my perception: I'm a Christian and my wife and were both 20-something virgins when we married in 1980.

  4. I've got some blog changes in the works too! 'Tis the season. :)And wow, interesting stats on divorce. My parents are divorced and are both believers. I'm really not sure how all the factors play together. All I know is that I have to be in tune with the Lord each and every day and ask Him to help me ride out the lows of marriage that are bound to come. The attacks will hit, for sure, and we have to be prepared in advance.

  5. i think that this article isn't taking into account how pesty people can get when they are HOT. when you're hot and sweaty, you're more likely to get aggravated or peeved or whatever…so it stands to reason that the south is in the forefront. it's freakin' HOT there.

  6. Jeannie- leave it to the resident therapist to throw a light on it that I hadn't considered! 🙂

  7. First time to visit your blog, Jennifer … and you're talking change–and divorce. Ve-ery interesting.A friend of mine who is a faith-based counselor, says this: "Why do we say divorce is not an option? Of course it is. People get divorced all the time–ever 'religious' ones. The question is, what are we going to do so that we don't choose the option of divorce?"I like that way to look at it …

  8. I'm a writer too, and I'm commenting about your Wednesday change of pace. I agree with you. We writers are so much more than just writers, but that seems to be all (almost!) we blog about.I've started that same change in my blog. I am blogging more about my life than writing and am enjoying blogging more.

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