We recently announced that the baby we are expecting in March is a baby BOY!!
And I gotta tell you, we couldn’t be more excited. We’ve named him and are already talking about what his personality might be like, who he is going to look more like, what his interests are going to be… I’m daydreaming about this little man whom we won’t meet for ages, it feels like.
In case you are keeping count, this is baby #3 for us, and our third boy.
As we’ve let our friends and family know, most people have been wonderful– sharing our excitement and offering hearty congratulations and for that, we are most appreciative.
But there has been some weirdness.
It’s because of this weirdness that I want to offer some advice on what NOT to say to a pregnant woman. Especially one who is expecting her third son. (This also applies to any woman expecting her third daughter. Or perhaps tenth.)
What not to say:
Yes, another. But I’m not using that word “another” when we talk about our son-to-be. He’s not just another. He’s an individual who has been perfectly designed by a mighty God. He might be our third son, but he’s more than just another.
“Awww, I wish it was a girl.”
Then perhaps, my friend, you should have your own daughter, because we do not wish it was a girl. Would I like to have a daughter? Sure. But God has blessed me with sons and I wouldn’t trade them for the world. My first two are so adorable and awesome that I am beyond excited to have son number three. So how about you just say, “Congrats”?
“Are you disappointed?”
Are you kidding me? We prayed for a baby forever. God answered our prayer. How could we be disappointed when God is giving us a miracle?? What in the world is there to be disappointed about?
“Wow. Three boys. Do you think you can do it?”
Do I have a choice? Of course I can do it. I think the first two are pretty incredible and I’m so grateful that God has given me a third boy to attempt to raise into a godly man. The world needs more godly men. I’m up for the challenge.
And my least favorite response we’ve gotten so far… (from several people, believe it or not)
“Oh, I’m so sorry.”
Are you serious? Sorry for what? We are THRILLED. See, here’s the thing: God has designed this baby, just as he is, to bless our family as part of HIS perfect plan. Don’t be sorry. Be excited. Be thankful. Be praying for this child as he grows. The only thing you have to be sorry about is not realizing the majesty and miracle that has gone in to creating this beautiful child.
Okay, so whether a woman is having her second, third, or twelfth son (or daughter), please keep in mind what NOT to say so that you don’t end up hurting her feelings, or worse, making yourself look insensitive to her joy.
A simple “congratulations” is always appropriate.
Share with me: Anyone ever say anything weird to you while you (or your wife) were expecting?