Category Archives: Writing

August 10, 2011 · 5:00 am

Constructing the Perfect Man- Personality Potpourri

Okay, so last week for my Writer Wednesday post we discussed the construction of the “perfect man” based on physical characteristics.

I was surprised by two things: 
1. how many of you read the post but didn’t answer the questions. For those of you who did answer, I appreciate it so much and I loved your feedback! (Hey- it’s not too late to jump back to that post here and leave a response, ladies! I could use your input!)
2. The guys who so bravely left their comments. Way to go, fellas!

One of my theories on why some of you ladies may not have given your opinion on the last “Constructing the Perfect Man” post is that for some of you, looks don’t matter. So I expect to read a lot from you on this one. 🙂

So, we move on. Today I want to know what it is about a man’s personality that attracts you.

Do you like the funny-man? The brooder? The protector? The lover? The sensitive man? The care-giver? The perfectionist? The wanderer? The one who is outspoken? The strong, silent type?

I think we all like a combination of many traits.  But the personality traits that we love can be over-kill if given in large doses. For example, I can appreciate the man who is in tune with his emotions, but I don’t want a weepy dude who cries at the drop of a hat.

Once again, I’ll remind you that when we write romance, one of the things that is purposeful is creating a man that the reader can fall in love with. After all, if he’s going to get the girl and make all things good, the reader has to want that to happen.

Generally, romance readers like a man who is brave, strong, heroic, and eventually at some point in the book, passionate. But is this cliche?

Whether or not you like the Twilight Saga, Stephenie Meyer did a fantastic job of making Edward Cullen lovable. Just ask the millions of tweens, teens, and “Twi-Moms” out there who will tell you that E.C. stole their hearts. Why? It doesn’t have as much to do with him being written as physically attractive but more to do with the fact that he’s the ultimate protector. He’ll do anything to keep his girl safe. And that makes most girls swoon.

I know I’ve used Twilight as an example before, but it’s a well-selling series that has become not only a reading, but also cultural phenomenon.

So, I want you to think about your husband, significant other, favorite movie hero, book hero, etc., and tell me what it is about personalities of these men that makes them easy to love.

To help make this easier, I’ve listed my question below. Share your opinions. I’m interested to see what you find appealing.

Share with Me: What are the top 3 personality traits you find attractive in a man?

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August 3, 2011 · 5:00 am

Constructing the Perfect Man- Hey Good Lookin’

I was reading along on my Facebook feed the other day and noticed that a writer friend posted a question about romance books.  One of her friends replied to her post something like, “I don’t read romance because the guys in those books are never the kind I’d go for.”

And it got me thinking. In romance novels, there’s generally one kind of “hero.” He’s often (although not always, of course) tall, dark, and handsome, and in some way rugged, often a jack-of-all-trades, most often muscley, strong, loyal, and at least by the end, loving. He’s the perfect man.

Right? But maybe not. All women are different. All of us are attracted to different kinds of men– the bad-boy, the outdoorsy-type, the funny-man. All of us are attracted to different physical features as well.

And because I’m a writer, I’m always looking to please the reader and reach outside of that cookie-cutter hero to create a character who is attractive to a broader audience.

Now while we know that no man is perfect, we also all know that the “perfect man” is made up of a lot more than just looks.  There’s a lot more to creating a character that a reader can fall for, but I want to focus on one element at a time.

Reader-friends, writer-friends- I need your help.  I want your definition of the perfect man, one trait at a time.

Generally there is a formula that is followed for creating a hero-type, so we are going to break it down over the next few weeks. I want NEED your responses.

Today in Part 1 of this series of posts, let’s talk about physical features. I think we can all agree that in general, there’s a definition of what’s physically attractive. However, we are all attracted in different ways.

To prove the point, let’s talk for a sec about James Bond. While his “character” remains the same, I think that every lady out there is attracted to a different James Bond. For me, it’s Sean Connery all the way.  Possibly followed by Timothy Dalton, then Pierce Brosnan and so on. But Daniel Craig? Ew. I don’t find him attractive at all. And what about you? Which Bond do you find the most physically attractive?

Or if you need another example, let’s take the ever popular vampire.  Since vampires seem to be the “trendy” man to fall in love with, which vampire would you choose? Edward Cullen from Twilight? Stefan or Damon from The Vampire Diaries? Or how about Bill or Eric from True Blood? All of them are different physically, yet offer the same appeal.

What is the first physical feature you notice about a man? Eyes? Lips? Hands? Smile?

I find that my eye is generally attracted to men who fall into that “dark” category. Dark hair and eyes, and 90% of the time, I’ve noticed that the men I find handsome usually have a dimple in their chin. Weird, huh?

But what about you? When you are reading a romance novel or watching a movie or TV show, what kind of man do you find physically attractive? Are you in the tall, dark and handsome group, or the sandy-haired, tanned beach guy? Or how about a man with rough hands from working outside?

Share with me: Thinking physical features only (we’ll do personality, emotional, etc., later) what do you find attractive in a man? What is the first physical feature you tend to notice? Can you give me an example of someone (other than your spouse or significant other because that’s a given) that you find physically attractive and why?

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July 27, 2011 · 5:00 am

Jenny from the Block

Okay, sorry about the title of this post, but I just had to do it. 🙂

Writer’s block.  Those moments, hours, and days that sometimes stretch on for months.  
It seems like the creative juices have just stopped flowing; sometimes suddenly.  
It seems like the love for the characters that you once yearned to spend time with has all but died out.
It seems like it’s impossible to think of one more story, one more plot, one more objective or twist, or even one more line of dialog.
It seems like the passion has gone.  And when the passion dies, the words die.  
But what caused this sudden, frustrating bout of the mind versus the written word?
Writer’s block is not just sitting at the computer, staring at a blinking cursor on a blank page.  It’s an attitude.
Most of the time, writer’s block is caused by self-doubt.  It creeps in and takes over, pushing away all that we’ve created, all that we are passionate about, and instead breeds discouragement, anger, resentment, and the inability to take pride in our work.
The plot isn’t good enough.  The characters aren’t identifiable enough.  The objective isn’t clear.  The dialog is flat.  I just can’t think of anything else.  I don’t know how to make it work.  I’m not good enough.
But self-doubt can be beaten.  Self-doubt can be overcome.  Self-doubt can be destroyed.
In order to let go of the self-doubt, you have to:
Stop comparing yourself to others.  
Remember that you are an individual, created for a whole, defining, other-worldly purpose by the Creator who values everything that you do.  
Remember why you started.  
What sparked the passion in you?  Get back to it.  Remember the excitement you had when you first started, remember the reasons, grab hold of them, and let them release you from discouragement.
Get excited about something else.
Not loving what you are working on?  Start something new, work on it for a while, and come back to your first project at a later time.  Letting it sit will allow you to have a fresh attitude when you look at it later.
Release the pressure.  
Aim for completing a novel, not the novel.  If you happen to realize afterward that you’ve created the next great classic, good for you.  But don’t set that as your goal in the beginning.
Get inspired.  
Watch your favorite movie.  Read your favorite book.  Listen to your favorite song.  What is it about these pieces of art that speaks to you?  What is it that stimulates and motivates you?  Find it, use it.
Take a break.
If you’ve been working excessively, you need one.  Minds, like bodies, get tired and need to rest.  Chocolate always helps.
Get busy.
On the other hand, if you’ve been avoiding your project, get in there and get busy.  As many will say, writing horrible, awful sentences is still writing.  Get something on the page and worry about perfecting it later.
Be your own cheerleader.
Read something that you’ve written that you really, really love.  It might be a completed work, or it might be a paragraph, or just one, amazingly perfect sentence.  Whatever it is, read it and revel in the reality that you created it.  Give yourself a pat on the back.
Writer’s block is not a lack of words; it’s a lack of self-confidence to write the words.  To overcome it, you have to let go of your own purposes and see God’s purposes revealed in you.  When you overcome the self-doubt and realize that you are a child of God, anything is possible.
 *While this post is about writing, it can be applied to any creative format, really.
Share with me:  How do you fight self-doubt in your life?  Have you ever had writer’s block, or just “creative block?” How did you get rid of it?

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