Tag Archives: motherhood

The Mommy Wars: Who’s Really Winning

Holding Hands

Stay-at-home moms v. Working moms. It’s an ugly battle. It rages in the media, across Facebook pages and in articles written by women who accuse each other of being less-than-women because of their personal choices. It’s a battle filled with venom-laced words, accusatory tones and emotional tirades.

I’ve been the victim before. I’m sure you have, too.

Moms. Stop it.

Stop it right now.

This “Mommy War” business has to end. Mostly because no one is winning and no one ever will. Satan is winning.

For too long now we’ve pitted our sides against each other, ignoring the sisterhood of mothering that binds us, strutting around with our “to do” lists hanging out of our over-sized bags, judging each other based on who can accomplish the most tasks.

Well accomplishing tasks has nothing to do with mothering.

Nothing at all.

Working moms can be terrible mothers. Stay-at-home moms can be terrible mothers.

Working moms can be amazing mothers. Stay-at-home moms can be amazing mothers.

So why are we intent on abusing each other verbally and emotionally because of what we DO?

Why not instead lift each other up because of who we ARE?

Because we are too busy listening to The Deceiver who tells us that in order to be fulfilled we must find happiness.

So he robs us of the joy that we have in our family, our situations, our lives in the moment. Instead this Deceiver forces us to acknowledge what we don’t have instead of what we do. He tells us that the focus of our lives is perfection that can be attained—we can have it all and that getting it will bring us happiness. He tells us that our lives are not for living, instead they are for achieving. We must do more, accomplish more, make more.

But what if we could just be more?  Woman Walking

What if, no matter our “profession,” our time, talents, and energies went into glorifying God in every moment of every day?

What if we stopped looking at the “to do” list of another woman, judging her based on her accomplishments, and focused on ourselves and how we could be more for God?

Who would benefit? Those around us. Our husbands. Our children. Our families. Our co-workers.

Too many times we burn our candle at both ends because we’re too busy trying to please everyone but the One who matters.

What if our candle was lit at both ends to shine a brilliant light for the Only One who has ever lived Perfection?
What if, instead of judging each other because we have a career or stay at home, we held each other accountable for our glorification of God?

The Deceiver would have us believe that we can have it all. That desire is the under-running current of the Mommy Wars.  It’s draining.

What we need, moms, is to be filled. Filled with joy. Filled with love, compassion, and sisterhood. Filled with success and encouragement, filled with desire and motivation.

Want to be fulfilled as a mom? Turn to the Only One who can fill you.

Then share that joy with another woman. Lace your words with encouragement and delight. Motivate another mom today with the happiness that comes from joy in the Lord.

Share with me: What is the most encouraging piece of advice another mom or woman has given you?


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Busy Mom? Find Peace In Your Day– Guest Post from Jill Kemerer


Maybe you’ve survived the infant years, the sticky fingers, the markers on walls, potty training, and basic disciplining. Maybe you’ve even cleared the hurdles of teaching your kids to read and honing their multiplication tables. No matter what stage you’re in, as long as you have kids under your roof, you’re guaranteed to be busy!

Moms need time to just breathe. Every morning I grab my coffee, read the Bible, and spend time in prayer. But I’ve worked another peace-inducer into my life, and it’s possible to do no matter what stage of motherhood you’re in.

I take a walk.

Simple, right?

Wait. I walk alone.

Sure, you can take your kids with you, but that isn’t peace inducing. When you bring them, they chatter, fight, race ahead, and generally interrupt your thoughts.

You need to relax, get a clear head. You need silence.

Suck in the fresh air. Lift your face to the sky. See those clouds? The leaves wiggling on branches? Birds sailing from tree to tree? Snowflakes drifting down? All of this requires you to slow down. To be silent. It opens a space in your heart. Gives you a break from the noise and bustle, even if it’s for three minutes.

When you take the time to find peace in your day, you get an extra sliver of patience. Your hugs last a little longer. Your meals become a little tastier. You feel better. You are better.

Give it a try!

Share with me: How do you find peace in your day?

JillKemererCgroupJill Kemerer writes inspirational romance novels. Coffee fuels her mornings; chocolate, her afternoons. A former electrical engineer, she now enjoys a healthy addiction to magazines, fluffy animals, and her hilarious family. She is a member of ACFW and RWA and MVRWA. Jill is represented by Rachel Kent of Books & Such Literary Agency.

To learn more about Jill, check out her website, stop by her blog, find her on Facebook, and follow her on Twitter.

Heaven knows I’m in a place in the joy of motherhood where I could use a little peace from time to time. Thank you for sharing this wisdom, Jill! You speak truth!

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The Secret to Defeating That Too-Long “To Do” List

To Do List

God has given each one of us extraordinary gifts. Each one of us is blessed with talent. While our talents differ, we all have at least one. But more than talent, we are blessed with ability.

Our levels of ability differ, too, but all of us have the ability to exist, the ability to give, and the ability to accomplish.

Take a look at your to-do list. How long is it?

If it’s anything like mine, it’s beginning to rival the length of Webster’s dictionary. The number of items on my to-do list multiplies daily, yet most days only a select few things get marked off.

But I have the ability to accomplish the things on my list. Ability that is God-given.

He has given me a body. He has given me a brain. He has given me today. With those three things, I can accomplish so much.

The way to glorify God in my daily life is to accomplish the tasks on my to-do list to the very best of my ability.

I’m constantly telling my children, “A job worth doing is worth doing well, and doing a job well makes God happy.”

That’s the kid way of saying “put away laziness and work to the best of your ability, for this pleases the Lord.”

Hard work is just that—often difficult and grueling. But when we set our mind to a task and use the talents and abilities that God has given us to complete these tasks, we glorify him by appreciating his creation and putting to use that which He created.

Why should I bother caring whether or not I’ve done my very best job mopping my kitchen floor? Or finessing the details on that project at work? Or not letting my child get away with talking back to me? Or replying to that email I’ve been ignoring?

Because God cares about me.

God cares whether or not I’m exhausting the talents and abilities He’s given. He cares whether or not I appreciate the gift.

Appreciating His gift in our abilities to accomplish tasks, no matter how menial, glorifies him. And our very purpose on this earth is to glorify God in all things.

So many of us are weary from chasing after that to-do list, desperate to mark off the tasks and feel as though we’ve accomplished something each day. But if we shift our focus from mere completion to glorification of our Heavenly Father, our accomplishments mean so much more.

Work as hard as you can today. Give each task 100% of your attention and your effort, no matter what you are doing.

Even if you feel like your task doesn’t matter to God, remember that your ability to glorify Him does.

The secret to defeating that ever-growing “to do” list is to do everything to the best of your ability, with your focus on glorifying the one who gave you those abilities. Pretty soon you’ll realize that tasks on your list aren’t the important thing—it’s how you complete them.

Now, I’ve got a floor that needs cleaning. Praise Him!

She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.

Proverbs 31:27

Share with me:   What task on your to-do list is getting most of your time and attention today?

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